Newsletter w/c 5.10.20

Fixtures for Saturday 10th October

Results on Saturday 3rd October

Team	Opposition	R	Score
1sts	Fulham Compton	W	3-2
2nds	Reigatians	W	4-4
3rds	Glyn Old Boys 2s	L	3-1
4ths	Royal Sun Alliance	L	3-2
5ths	Dorkinians 4s	L	3-2
6ths	Sinjun OG 3s	L	3-0
7ths	Old Wokingians 6s	L	6-3
8ths	Pembroke Old Boys	L	6-0
Sat Vets	Chelsea Vets	L	6-0

Match Reports

Old Meads 1s 3 – 2 Fulham Compton
(Bright 2, Kimpton)

10am I text Gordy …

Kev “Gordy Joe Marshall is worried about the rain on his pants and socks at side of pitch, shall we get down three hours early and put the Gazebo up ?”

Gordy “yes ok let’s put ground sheets down as well so he’s dry on his feet“

Kev “What about a mirror”

Gordy “Yes I will borrow one of my daughters and we will tie it to side of gazebo ,oh and I can bring their mobile nail bar“

Kev “Fantastic , I will bring some hair Gel and a bag of cotton wool for him , keep him warm at half time and to dry off post match“

Gordy “What colour nail varnish do you think ??“

Kev “Deffo a light pink , I will text Joe back to assure him he will be ok“

After two draws in their first two league matches Meads looked to improve further.

Xavi is now the fines coordinator and has taken to the job like a duck to water. With the 1s fines system now in play it’s amazing to see most players turning up at the appointed meet time ,Rash Ovie aside. On Saturday lunchtimes Rash loves to go car spotting on the A40 in his souped up VW Polo. Sits up and takes photographs off different makes of motor vehicles and sends them to the WhatsApp group for some of the team to mull over. Fishman retired to the bushes at this point. Rash’s current favourite is a Silver Merc.

When the squad were all present we did our “item of the week” which this week was chosen by Mike , he chose sunglasses…. two players didn’t produce the shades , Medish and ………Mike himself ….nailed on for WIG ?????? ……….

The match began and again Meads were a bit lethargic getting into the game. Fulham C were pressing and had the majority of possession. Slowly we started working and creating, we were rewarded when Brighty was “touched” in the penalty box and went down like his hero Tom Daley. Brighty dusted himself down and smashed the penalty into the net 1-0 Meads. At this point it’s fair to say some heavy tackles were going in on Meads and going unpunished. Meads game improved and after a great Brighty corner Charlie Kimpton smashed one in the roof of the net 2-0 and in control. This is where we need to put teams to bed ……..We then allowed Fulham to score 2 goals to get it back to 2-2 admittedly their first was offside by two yards at least. Several of our players were now getting smashed in terrible tackles and Brighty complained to ref and was told he was now a marked man by ref ??? By now Joe Richardson and Caino were clicking down the left and time after time were just being fouled and same players escaping any cards.

Meads again restored the lead with some individual brilliance from Brighty

Xavi then scored a 4th from a corner but the ref deemed it offside HT Meads 3-2

Gordy ,freshly moving around now from his recent stomach tuck operation was not pleased and gave the full hairdryer treatment. The players themselves knew we were playing well below what we are capable off .

We started the second half positively and could and should have finished the game off. 10 minutes in and a tackle on Charlie Cain which I will describe as one of the worst tackles I’ve ever seen in grassroots football in many years. He was lucky not to have his leg broken. As straight a red card as you will see this season but the ref gave a yellow. Caino off. A reshuffle saw Mike into midfield and Rash on at back with Nick on left. Kimpton was making vital interceptions at the back. Tom and Medish were working hard to try and hit their recent form. Jamie was introduced for his debut. Marsh was making a few excellent stops. We were creating chances, just that final ball wasn’t perfect.

With 12 minutes to go Meads took a throw in which never came on the pitch – retake ? No ref gives it the other way , this incensed big Kev and a few words were shouted at the ref trying to explain the ball didn’t come into play …. The ref then engaged with Kev at side of pitch which resulted in Kev being “ Sent to the bushes” . Obviously a clear misunderstanding of the English language between a Yorkshire Ref and a Scottish coach……. WIG now deservedly scooped away from Mike and into the hands of Kev.

A tense 10 minutes saw Meads hold on and get their first win of the season. Not at our best but 3 points on the board. We remain unbeaten.

Well done lads!

MOM was Ryan Bright – excellent display both on and off the ball.

WIG was Kev …Embarrassed

PS – did anyone spot a frustrated Ed Glover kicking every ball from behind the gazebo?

Old Reigatians 2s 2 – 4 Old Meads 2s
OG
Ali Gordon x 2
Lewis Thom

Matchday 3 saw the 2s head to Reigate and face arguably the toughest test of the season so far – how to play on a pitch with a 30 degree incline and a surface that potato salesman Joey Yates would be proud of.

As the game kicked off, it quickly became apparent that Reigatians would have no such problem… their centre halves adopting Peter Kay’s John Smith approach to the game and hoofing it every time the ball came within kicking distance – “Av it!”. Meads however stuck to their game plan and soon carved Reigatians open, forcing an own goal to make it 1-0 Meads after less than 10 minutes.

Reigatians continued to go route 1 and it soon brought them some joy as a knock down was deflected onto Jack Cinamon’s arm and a penalty was given. Despite Jack’s polite request for an explanation – “What kind of crack are you smoking ref?” – the man in the middle’s mind was not to be changed and Reigatians’ big striker duly placed the ball on the spot. Meads co-gaffer Greening was, however, in no mood for any charitable donations this week and got down brilliantly to parry the ball away. 1-0 it stayed but the visitors were now down to 10 after Cinamon’s comments saw him sinbinned.

Soon after, Meads extended their lead. Cultured Frenchman Romain Leroy combined well with wannabe Welshman Ed McKenna and set Ali Gordon up at the edge of the area. The Paisley Pele again demonstrated his eye for a goal as he drilled the ball past the hapless keeper and into the bottom corner. A bit of ‘Va Va Voom’ from Le Meads and 2-0 up we went.

Almost on the stroke of half time, Meads made it 3. A corner was cleared by Reigatians but fell to left back Lewis Thom (the latest in a worryingly long list of Scotsman to don the claret and blue…) on the edge of the area. Ignoring calls to float it back in, Raberto Carlos (as he’s now demanded he be called) hammered the ball low into the corner of the net. Scintillating stuff from the Falkirk native.

Despite starting the second period well, Meads made hard work of finishing the game off (hampered in part by an injury to Nicky Rankin who had been at the heart of much of Meads’ good work) and allowed Reigatians to claw a goal back. Another penalty was given, again against Meads’ resident sniffer dog (and would-be author of this report if he didn’t have “too much uni work”), Mr Cinamon, but was taken well by the other striker this time and slotted home to hand Reigate a lifeline – 3-1.

Reigatians continued to probe but Meads’ defence stood strong and the attack, orchestrated well by Alex Monk and Harry Sanders, always looked dangerous. A nice through ball from the “selfless” Ed Kenna (a man keen to avoid the “more Wigs than goals” tag that Aaron Glover famously wore a few years ago…) to Ali allowed the latter to finish clinically and restore the 3-goal cushion.

With 15 to go, yet another ball was sent long by Reigatians but this time, was despatched by their striker to make it 4-2. Despite Meads still holding a two goal lead and looking good for the win, the game ended in slightly nervy fashion after Simon decided to rehearse his best Jonesy from Dad’s Army impression, screaming “Don’t panic!!” at the top of his lungs every 5 seconds. Thankfully, nobody did, and Meads headed back up the road with their first ‘W’ of the season .

A strong performance, 3 points in the bag and the only concern being how to calm Simon the f*ck down. Nicky’s suggestion of “homemade” cookies before the next match may not be a bad idea…

Old Meads 3s – 1 – 3 Glynn old boys

1st Half –Meads were full of fresh faces for this encounter against a well-known opposition but were well prepared having completed our warm up before the old boys even togged out. Meads lined out in traditional Mike Basset style 4-4 Fucking 2 formation, and were on the back foot early as the old boys started brightly pushing a highly offensive line and winning lots of petty fouls in dangerous positions. This paid dividends early on as they were awarded and converted a soft penalty for a challenge by Amine. Meads luck did not improve as Owen fell victim to the 3s skipper curse suffering a painful knee injury in the 22nd minute.

Adlane stepped in alongside Ian hunter now wearing the captain’s armband. Meads soon woke up and dominated the next hour of the encounter. Yatesy had his man in his back pocket as he turned over every ball down the left (check out Brightys insta for the proof). And we got the equaliser we deserved when the energetic Jack Book guided a superb header home from a pin point delivery courtesy of Adlane.

HT 1-1

2nd half – Joe Jones impressed on his debut as he continued to cause havoc up top beating several men only to be denied by an excellent save tipping his shot onto the bar.

Playing nice football out from the back Amine, Shae and Greg began to link up well to create a number of crossing opportunities with two goal line clearances the old boys were on the ropes as they looked for anything to prevent the imminent defeat, whilst working themselves up about the sight of Adam Glover warming up on the sideline having appeared from nowhere and questioning if he was on the team sheet

Entering the 80th minute meads got caught on the break as the old boys striker found himself 1 on 1 and 20 yards from goal but was well matched by a brilliant save low and right as Sherry parried for a corner. Sherry would turn out to play judas in this story as needing to leave with GAA commitments he was then subbed off for Adam Glover, who had not been planned as the super striker Glyn feared but Alan’s way of making sure he wouldn’t have to go in nets for the last 10 with a gammy knee.

Unfortunately this was the turning point in the game, Glyn snatching victory with 2 late goals on the break, the 1st Meads taking slightly too long on the ball in midfield and being robbed of possession from where Glyn worked it to their left winger who took a good shot from the edge of the box that beat Adam (who hadn’t had a chance to warm up) at the near post. The 2nd, a long ball over the top, a missed header and they square it for an easy finish at the back post.

End of the game – Score: 1-3. Meads deserved more from a hard fought display with a lot of new faces but an early reminder that this can be a tough league

MOM : Jack Book

WIG: Joshua Sherry (for leaving early)

We liked: – Meads showed great ability and and outplayed Glynn for large portions of the game.

We didn’t like: – The soft fouls awarded and lack of clinical finishing.

Match Report provided by the WIG Joshua Sherry

Royal Sun Alliance 3 – 2 Old Meadonians IV

The dreaded 11am text… Closely followed by the 11.03 text, down to 11 men. Despite a mad scramble, an away game in the wet in Croydon is not an easy sell so the Wildcats went with 11.

A brief rendezvous on platform 13 with Reidy’s Rangers/Si’s Strikers (answers on a postcard) & we were off to the peak of outer suburbia, Upper Warlingham, to face a strong RSA side. A case of 4 out and 2 into the matchday squad, Toby & Chris making their meads debuts and both reliably informing me they hadn’t played 11 a side in 5/6 years so no chance they could play 90… chins up lads.

First 10 and we struggled to get to grips with the small pitch with the game resembling a dive bar pinball machine rather than a football match. 15 minutes in and Chris gives me a look I last saw at his fresher’s initiation prompting a switch between him and the housewives favourite on the left. The change helped us grow into the game with Lum & Rob getting on the ball and utilising the wide men Harrison & Aidan. Alan McInally Rorke providing the classic commentary of ‘the first goal in this game is going to be huge’, thanks Rorke. Then disaster, a badly defended throw and with the ball out on the fishing line I had a big old chomp… peno given, 1-0. We fought back into the game, Toby and Kody linking up well creating openings before a ball was centred by Toby, Aidan arrived, 1-1  the moment you needed a shinner into the corner you catch it flush and the ball heads into orbit. Harrison kept their RB firmly on toast and more chances were created but no equaliser. HT, 1-0.

Rorke with a rousing HT team talk ‘The next goal in this game is going to be huge’, thanks Rorke.

Second half, Wildcats in control, Marlon linking with Aidan, Chris with Harrison, Rob & Lum bossing the engine room, Kody & Toby dangerous, me & Steve kicking people and winning headers, Rorke as solid as always, a goal had to come….. It did, despite an amazing free kick save from Rorke the ball fell to RSA, 2-0. Curtains? No chance, off the canvas meads won a corner, Aidan delivered (superb all day), Clemo won, Rob shot, Kody backheeled and Harrison tucked away, 2-1. More chances came and went, Lum fell on the ball with the goal gaping, Marlon crossed to their keeper (a lot) …. Then a sucker punch, 3-1. As the fat lady cleared her throat there was another twist, Harrison fed Toby who lashed home, 3-2. Even with a last-ditch Kody effort we couldn’t force the equaliser and eventually went down 3-2.

Herculean effort from all, a bare 11 against 14, any skipper would be proud of. 11 MoM’s but Harrison took the home the bubbly with a goal & assist and nightmares for their RB. Marlon taking a tough WIG for crossing completion. Still 2^nd, still fighting, still Wildcats.

MoM – Harrison Marks        WIG – Marlon Wright

Squad – Rorke – Marlon – Steve – Clemo – Chris – Lum – Rob – Aidan – Harrison – Kody – Toby

Quote of the day – Steve Villard – Greggs & Steak Bakes are the most English thing I’ve ever known.

Old Meads 5s 2 – 3 Dorkinians 4s

After a self-imposed touchline ban spanning several years, last Saturday’s 5th team game against Dorkinians was a proper reminder of the joys of Meads captaincy. In this very strange year, a few things have changed, but an awful lot hasn’t. So I’ve written a list. Two lists in fact. I like lists. At my age, they help me remember stuff.

Things that haven’t changed:

– High level negotiations over team selection that would challenge most UN peacekeepers.
– Saturday morning cry offs.
– Saturday afternoon BOLO* issued for a missing person.
– Pre match team talk (“we were too nice last week, get stuck in”; “talk to each other”; “keep it simple”; “big first ten” etc etc..) out of the window within 5 minutes.
– Generously giving the oppo a 2 goal headstart
– Half time team talk to check everyone heard the pre match team talk.
– Battling performance to get back into the game (Meads love being an underdog) only to concede late on and lose 3-2.
– Chris Bridle. Like a fine wine…gives centre halves a massive headache

Things that have:

– Team selection now negotiated by WhatsApp, GIFs and Emoji’s used to break tension (achieve passive aggression)
– Saturday morning cry off due to Covid testing, not projectile vomiting or waking up in the Home Counties accompanied by a feeling of dread and smell of shame.
– Missing person located safe and well (rested) in his own bed. Very disappointing.
– Chris Bridle. Appeared to be neither drunk or hungover. Unsettling.

Few things for us to learn from in the first half, but can’t really fault anyone ** in the second. Great effort all round and some pretty decent football played. MOM Jason for his two goals, honourable mention to Evan for recovering from Covid even quicker than Trump and putting in a very solid 80 mins.

Team: Evans, Klajnscek, Tanner, Mitchell, Ryan, Jackson, Gates, Wallace, Youle, Tizroutine, Bridle, Ring, Reid

*BOLO – Be on the look out (for anyone who hasn’t ploughed through 10 series of NCIS or similar in lockdown..)

** Ah, yes, nearly forgot – I did crash a penalty into the allotment fence just after half time. Which makes me the proud owner of the WIG and author of this report..hopefully most have stopped reading long before now..

Meads 6s vs Sinjuns

Saturday 26th September, 4.00pm.

Me: What was the score lads? 

4.10pm.

Me: Lads, how did we get on? 

4.20pm. 

Me: Lads….

I’m then kindly informed that we had been rolled over 4-0. Several things in the office are kicked or Launched. Checks next weeks oppo. No game. Well that isn’t happening! DT, get us a friendly!! 

So a friendly was arranged vs Sinjuns from the league above. The week was spent working out how we can stop this rut and a change of formation was the answer. Now anyone who knows me knows that I’m a 4231/433 guy, so we decided on a 352. 

3 sleepless nights pass and Saturday arrives. Team talk is given. Shocked faces galore at the change of formation. 

Game starts with no real issues with the exception of nothing sticking up top where we had effectively gone into a 361 formation. Until 20 minutes in, the ball was lost in the middle of the park, a whipped ball into the box and Sinjuns unmarked striker was there to nod home. 1-0. An undercooked pass from the keeper into Troy, Troy into smithy, smithy got closed down early, striker nicks the ball and slides the ball under the keeper. 2-0. This is why I f***ing hate playing out the back at times. 

Half time comes. Arguments ensue amongst the team. Standard Amateur Saturday football team talk ‘Giving them too much respect’ ‘stick to your positions’ ‘be stronger in tackle’ you know how it goes. Change of formation (I mean everyone knew this was coming). 433.

We were actually the better team in the second half and had Sinjuns on the back foot. Our front 3 pressing caused them to lose the ball on the edge of their area 3 times and we capitalised on…. NONE! The game started to get a bit scrappy with Nico being put in a headlock by their left back at one point and some late tackles. 

There seemed to be no way back into the game for Meads and everyone seemed to have given up when Sinjuns got their 3rd. A corner was not cleared properly and it fell to the edge of the box where their player was waiting kindly to hit home. 3-0. He couldn’t decide on his celebration, so he lifted his shirt and then sat on the ground (I suppose he’s a big fan of Haaland?). 

Game ended 3-0. 3 losses on the bounce for the 6s. But we tried something knew. We move on. We will turn this around. 

Man of the Match  – Alfie 

Wig/Moose of the match – Smithy 

Old Wokingians VI 6 – 3 Old Meadonians VII

Summary: We were under the cosh from minute 1 at least for 10 mins, soaked it up well. They must have had 4 shots got nada! We started to get into the game after that, Mal put Andrew through on the right wing, he dropped his shoulder and put away a great goal.. second goal was an OG again from another set piece from Mal, I though Paul got on the end of it but it was the oppo’s defender. They scored and made it 2-1 (massive foul on Christian) ref just let it go.

Striker fouled Chris as he was palming away a cross. Their striker was about 18st, wasn’t right, but tbf Paul got away with a stone wall pen in the first 5 so evened things out. Andrew then made it 3-1, only caught the net bulge but apparently it was a miss kick, off the back of a deflection from a shot from Paulo. Christian then decided to give the oppo a free goal, kicked it straight to their striker and boom 3-2. Shocker, we then allowed them to score again, didn’t really see how this happened was just shocked. This was turning into a game of ping pong, after 5 mins we got a pen as Radik was brought down in the box, Andrew let him take it.. (if that was me I’d be like nah bro) but hey he felt he earned it, then fucked it! Hit straight at the keeper, Andy then misses the follow up.

After half time we literally imploded, we lost one goal and then tired to chase the game, badly. We were soft and got bullied, to the point where we were pulling away from headers and playing negative football. Midfield started to go to shit, as did the defence, attackers weren’t effective, we simply gave up, 3 goals later there were glimpses of a fightback but we just sat on the fence.

Damage was done and we accepted it. Note a good ground for me, more bad memories now!

Final Score

6-3

MOM: Andrew Newman for 2 well-taken goals

WIG: Christian Langford for handing the oppo a goal on a plate

Old Meads VIII 0 – 6 Pembroke Old Boys 

Team sheet Ed Ben L Ben W Jean Joe Stan Ant Callum Dillon Henry Nick Elliot Borja Yusuf

Meads 8s started off with a 5-3-2 formation this week against Pembroke Old Boys (POB) – a newly formed team. With the opposition having 2/2 wins already, it wasn’t going to be an easy game. Meads felt ready though, with a good omen from weatherman Nick correctly predicting the weather pre-game. 

Meads 8s got off to a slow start, conceding 2 of the 6 goals in the first half. The defence was good for the first 20 mins, Elliot and others showing strength at the back but unfortunately, the opposition found a way through – a bit like the Rona did to Trump. However, bursts of good play forward was evident from Meads with Weekes getting into space and rolling some shots away and then Henry driving one low and hard pin-balling out for a corner.  

The 2nd half proved to be more difficult, with the score line running away from Meads quicker than Weekes can tie his laces. Another goal from POB just after the 2nd half kick off caused heads to slump, 3-0. Then finally some luck, a penalty awarded to Meads. Weekes stepped up to the spot, showing more confidence than a peacocks feathers, but the keeper guessed right and parried it back out, Weekes with a shot again on the rebound but the keeper got there. 

POB showed themselves to be the better side on the day with 2 more goals going in after the penalty. Meads switched to the old reliable 4-3-3 formation, showing some fight back, but it was all too little too late. The last goal went in on the 90th minute in an unfortunate deflection from a free kick.

Despite the loss this week, Meads were unlucky not to have scored and we had our biggest turnout yet of 5 fans.

MOTM – Elliot Ross
WIG – Ben Weekes

Chelsea Vets  6 – 0 Old Meadonians Vets  0     (League Cup)

There were a few kick-offs last weekend with the Vets team but let’s start with the pre kick-off. The highlight being Mark Wilson pointing out a huge Gazebo to Karl Bolton at Kings House Sports Ground.  You would have to read previous match reports for that to make any sense.

In terms of the actual game it was a recent familiar story of us lacking in striking firepower and terrible ball retention throughout the team. We were up against a Chelsea Vets team who have ex-semi pro’s, Dwayne (ex Meads) and ex pros’s Sean Davis and Barry Hayles. 

Chelsea Vets previous two league games ending up in two straight wins, a 7-1 win against Claygate Royals and 6-0 win against Old Tiffinians.  Obviously dead certs for the Div 1 title.  Our form has been poor with two 1-0 defeats.  Superb battling in our defence but lacking any real edge and never dominating in any of our two league games or cup match.

As you can imagine Chelsea Vets completely dominated but it was a pleasure to play against them.  We will have to play them two more times in the league this season.  Hopefully we can improve on the result next time.  As you noticed, I have skipped over the game, for the best really.

Fortunately, there is no deadline day for the Vets League, so we are still on the hunt for another winger and striker to help improve the team.  The full squad being available for selection will really help, which has not yet happened in the friendlies or league/cup games.  That is an important factor.

It did kick-off on the Vets WhatsApp group over the rest of the weekend but hopefully like I said we all pull together now, enjoy it and pickup our first points in the league very soon.  Its good the squad does care and really have a strong will to win.

Short match report this week but just looking to future games now and not dwelling on the past.

Written by Steven Fox