Newsletter w/c 19.10.20
- 19th October 2020
Fixtures Saturday 24.10.20
|Venue / Referee
|Away – Chiswick Cricket Club, Riverside Drive, W4 2SP
|Away – Grist Memorial Ground, Summer Avenue, East Molesey, Surrey, KT8 9LU
|Old Wokingians IV
|Home – Pitch 1 / Krandeep Singh Grewal
|Wandsworth Borough IV
|Away – Richardson Evans Memorial Ground, Roehampton Vale, London, SW15 3PQ
|Shene Old Grammarians IV
|Barn Elms, Ground A, Entrance opposite The Wetlands, not the pitches at the end of the road.
|Home – Pitch 2 / Robert Benardout
|Old Guildfordians III
|Stoke Park, London Road, Guildford, GU1 1TU
|Home – Pitch 4 / Alexander Whiteman
|Wandsworth Borough II
|Fulham Compton III
|Old Tiffinians II
|Glyn Old Boys III
|Sinjun Grammarians IV
|Old Tiffinians IV
Old Meadonians 2 – 1 Wandsworth Borough
Despite still being early in the season the visit of wandsworth borough to riverside lands on Saturday felt like a big game for the 1st team. After a nervy start to the season with just 1 win from 4, and after a poor display against thorns the week before, we knew we needed 3 points more than ever.
With everyone dropping points and nobody in the league looking particularly commanding we could be right back in the mix with a win. But a loss and the table wouldn’t be pretty viewing and it could be a long way back.
Wandsworth had started the season pretty well, and in the last two weeks had beat Hamps in a cup final and then Wokes in the league, so we knew it was going to be tough, and to make things worse we only had 12 at kick off due to a couple of late drop outs. Those unavailable included:
- Chris Jones – meads new boy and the self-proclaimed ‘welsh John Parkin’, woke up with a tummy ache Saturday morning
- Matt Merrick – reason for absence unknown but one can only imagine he was scarred by his first meads night out, getting his ears chewed off by Billo and Reidy until 7am last Saturday
- Tom Timmins – away at a Superior Striker Shooting School after taking recent criticism in front of goal to heart
- Charlie Cain’s mate – rumours of a late deadline day deal for Caino’s semi-pro mate quashed by Ed Glover who conveniently found an issue with the transfer on page 376 of the club transfer policy and kept his place in the starting line up
- Andrew Thompson – sent text to management ruling himself out with a broken rib following recent self follatio procedure. Unnecessary text as was never selected
- Dan Stewart – I prefer not to speak
Despite the absentees, the performance on the pitch was much better. Having fallen behind to an early penalty against the run of play we dominated the reminder of the first half, and went in 1-1 at half time thanks to Medish who got his fully deserved first league goal of the season by getting on the end of a Charlie Cain free kick.
We started the second half in the same manner, keeping Wandsworth pegged back and were rewarded when a Caino strike was deflected into Xav’s path who finished expertly to put us 2-1 up. We were the better team for the remainder of the game and limited the oppo to only a couple of half chances, and deservedly took home 3 points.
Credit to all the boys for a much improved performance, but special mention to the 3 subs – Romain, Wilson and Lewis (the latter two who had just played for the 2s but agreed to stay and help us out) who each did an excellent job when called upon and played a massive part in the result.
Wig – Brighty for pre-game dump in shrubbery next to the 1st team pitch
MOTM selected by Rory – Also Brighty
Meads II 2 – 0 Economicals
Meads 2’s descended upon Riverside Lands smarting from last week’s 4-1 reverse against RBS, keen to put that result to bed against an Economicals side who had been pumped the week before by Thorntonians in their first league game. As is the norm, there were a few stragglers after 12.15 keen to keep the OMFC central beer fund topped up. Amongst those was WIG incumbent Ally Gordon who somehow contrived to slip coming down the hill and pop something in his knee, which to everyone he spoke to later managed to find it hilarious….bunch of #&$£’s.
Once the usual bluster of the Reid/Greening team talk was done the players rolled out in a classic 4411 formation with Billo inheriting the No.10 jersey from his hero for the day and playing in his favoured position.
The first 5 minutes was all Eco’s with Meads struggling to get up to speed. A decent bit of play resulted in Eco’s getting into the box and a lofted cross was Superman punched out by Dan Wilson for a corner…no pen given. 2 minutes later the aforementioned Wilson did well to block a shot for a corner and from the resulting corner an unmarked flicked header drifted with all watching as it clipped the corner of post and bar and bounced away. Meads rebounded from this shock and the forward players who had done sweet FA to this point started to link up. Nic Wilson, dropping down to his real level, fluffed a chance when the oppo keeper cleared to his path 30 yards out. Wilson was not to be denied moments later when intricate play between the Gammon, the imposter 10 and Wilson set him off down the right and his first time cross across the edge of the box was gleefully rifled home into the top of the net by Kens, much to everyone’s surprise. “First from open play” the Meads support said – hopefully a few more to come.
Meads were on top now and a floated Stenners cross to Billowas hit on the half volley only to be deflected wide. A few more huff and puff corners and the oppo were let off. Things started to get tastier than a cheeky Holy Cow on a Saturday night with a few Cobras when skipper Reid thought he was heading for the last fence at the Gold Cup and barrelled through the back of oppo 9. Cue a few mins of cheap fouls and aggro as the game deteriorated. Just when the game looked as if it was going to turn ugly, Meads grabbed the initiative with Wilson “bursting” down the right wing, going by the LB and cutting around the keeper…surely a tap in but no, he somehow decides to go to ground and a pen is given. Kenna steps up and casually rolls it home, 2-0 Meads, comfy. The half still had some time to go with little to no real action apart from some highlight reel silks from Harold Sanders, sexy dragback and nutmeg on their 19 sucking his eyes out (you love to see it). HT 2-0.
The HT team talk was one of “we go again lads” and “keep it tight as they’ll come at us first 15” and all went back out motivated from these inspirational words to not let it slip. We started the half on the attack with Stenners getting what appeared to be his second touch of the game – apparently he’d be on since the start, who knew? Sending a through ball to Billo who was unable to get a touch. This frustration seemed to get the better of the man in the Sondico drip as for the next 5 minutes the red mist descended and he was swinging and kicking at anyone that moved. All a sly ploy to wind up the oppo obviously as it worked and they started asking some proper questions of the Meads defence. Great blocks by Ronald, Dan Wilson and Cinamon avoided clear strikes on goal and a header from a corner floated over before a cross drifted through the 6 yard box and hit the post. This period of pressure resulted in Meads retreating and it was compounded by their right winger leaving Stenners for dead with a nutmeg that should have seen him subbed immediately it was that career ending.
Young Bristolian with a terrible accent Jack Book entered the fray after some standout performances with the 3’s in recent weeks and struggled initially to get into the game wearing his glass slippers, leaving his midfield colleagues to do the work for him. By this stage a few changes were made with the evergreen Damo Reading getting the hook and as always, took the decision with great humility. With 10 mins to go the game looked set for a grandstand finish as a through ball to their big 9 set him in a chase with Dan Wilson. Wilson had a 5 yard headstart and looked like it was comfy however the quicksand he was running in slowly ate him up and the striker got a shot away which Si did well to block with his feet. Cue some standard expletives from the joint manager at his team. Meads rebounded and got nice and nasty with the oppo in the last 10 and tempers flared on more than a few occasions. There was time for another pen shout for the keeper cleaning out Jack Book but it was more that a sniper picked him out from a distance. Half chances came and went on the counter but the back 4 saw it out. FT 2-0
A proper solid, battling performance and miraculously a clean sheet. On to the Cup next week across the path.
MOM – Ed McKenna
WIG – Ally Gordon
Meads 3s 0 v 3 Wandsworth Borough 2s
(match report by WIG George Kelly):
Saturday was a day to forget for the 3rd team as they took on a physical Wandsworth Town B side. Meads started well with Adlane making some good link up plays in the midfield with Amine whilst Bunty and Alistair dealt with long balls over the top in defence with confidence.
However, despite the strong start it was Wandsworth who struck first with a counter attacking goal down the right-hand side and slot home a 1 on 1 finish however questions of an offside where asked and Meads’ confidence began to drop after that.
Shortly after going behind Amine struck from just outside the box which required a good save to the keepers bottom right corner which kept the game at 1-0.
At half time Jack came on and had a positive impact in the midfield despite already playing a game for the 2’s he still had plenty of energy to win his 1 on 1 battles. Unfortunately, the strong second half start wasn’t enough to prevent Wandsworth from getting a second despite some promising moments from the Meads just before.
The next goal was crucial, and it should have gone to Meads when a fantastic delivery from the left-hand side was driven across the box and put on a plate for George only to blaze it over the bar from 2 yards out (it bobbled).
After that Meads continued to play good football and despite having the fitter team near the end it was Wandsworth who scored their third in the dying minutes and left Meads to reflect on a bad day at the office.
The boy’s face Tiffs this Saturday, a team who have lost their opening 3 games of the season. This will be a chance for Meads to get back to winning ways and put last Saturday behind them as they look forward to what is going to be an exciting season.
The Tony Pulis ‘You only punt it long’ Wildcats 2 – 1 Those Whining Bastards in White
Saturday morning, counting the damage of Lidl’s Lager cans around the flat swearing about the classic 4th team late dropout, this week provided by Rory who having made himself available late Thursday night decided after being told he was playing at 9am the following morning that I was the one giving too short notice… not the fact he sent a text at 22.41 with no coherent words and 8 kisses the night before a game…
For the sake of the match report I will be referring to the opposition as the Whining Bastards (or the Whiners) for the fact they turned up, complained about our pitch and that they should be playing on pitch 1, even though they play at Barn Elms as they aren’t good enough to play on their own home pitch. They also spent 94 minutes moaning about our style of football and that their 6-foot-6 centre back (sideshow bob) was being fouled by our 5-foot-8 centre forward even as he was dragging him to the ground. Turns out Karma is a bitch.
3rd vs 4th with only goal difference separating the sides, with the Tony Pulis sponsored Wildcats without the housewives’ favourite Harrison & Rorke in nets, with Laurent stepping between the pipes and Jordan & Cahir (pronounced caaaaaarrrrraaaiiiirrr) debuting. Also, the evergreen Bazza filled the customary vets spot left by the penalty ‘specialist’ Quinny. A frenetic start to the game with makeshift LB Stevie V under pressure but scrambled defending keeping them out, the attacking threat provided by Rusty (yes he showed up) ably supported by Aidan & Toby with Luke and his fantastic hair mesmerising their back 4. A couple of early Meads corners came to nothing but weren’t to be denied when Lum fired in a shot that was destined for the corner only for Toby to channel his inner David Nugent and tap it in from on the line, 1-0. We got a bit lazy, shock, and some lacklustre defending led to a slightly fortunate equaliser, Jordan staying very quiet on whether it was an OG, 1-1. A quick tactical change to 5 at the back plugged the gaps and not much happened until halftime apart from them whining about everything, even the wind direction came in for criticism at one point and it was HT.
With Baz, Rob and Lum keeping the game simple across the middle and Cahir playing midfield like Forrest Gump, ‘I just kept running’, we were good value for a point and potentially more. Rusty came close to getting a winner only for a superb point blank save, they Whined about us tackling them as apparently this isn’t allowed in football, waving imaginary Yellow Cards and clearly not knowing how to count with the words ‘how many ref?!’ a constant commentary from Sideshow Bob. Laurent’s safe hands started to raise questions on whether he had superglue on his gloves and Marlon was just being, well Marlon, and surely another draw and a 3rd game without a win was on the horizon….
‘Hold my hat…’ says the ref. A terrible Whining Bastard tackle led to the first free kick of the game to the Wildcats in the 85th minute to which Sideshow Bob felt was far too soon so he was marched to the sin bin, obviously to think about ways to kill Bart Simpson, and their replacement skipper joined him after some more choice words to the ref. 11 vs 9. Ball delivered into the box, Cahir rises like a Salmon, false teeth in hand, and the ball nestles in the corner. 2-1, cheers. Final Whistle. Thanks for coming.
MoM – Cahir, can’t score a 90th minute winner on debut and not get MoM, fact.
WIG – Aidan, loves missing an open goal this lad.
Squad – Clemo – Laurent – Stevie V – Marlon – Jordan – Aidan – Rob – Lum – Luke – Rusty – Bazza – Cahir – Toby
Old Meadonians V 1 – 2 Old Tiffinians II
The 5’s maintained their 100% start to the campaign with yet another frustrating afternoon at the office. Against all odds we turned up on time and after the referees instructions which were in part confusing and in part (hopefully) unnecessary the teams lined up and the game got underway.
After a solid start against a well organised Tiffinians side, the away side continued to apply pressure and it felt like a matter of time before the boys in claret and blue were going to take the lead.
After a string of chances including hitting the bar twice in 2 seconds and a one-on-one which wasn’t converted, Evan broke down the right hand side and whipped an inch perfect ball into the path of Jason who neatly lifted the ball over the onrushing keeper. 0-1 Meads.
The first half continued in the same vein and Meads were unlucky not to be 3 or 4 up at half time, (oh how those Toblerone shooting boots would cost us)
The second half began and Tififinians started fast, after a couple of minutes a through ball found a Tiffs striker meandering around roughly 10 yards offside, no offside was called and the Tiffinians Centre Forward did the honours. 1-1.
Meads battled hard to retake the lead and both teams enjoyed chances as the game opened up. On the hour mark Meads were awarded a penalty, but after missing one last time out this was by no means a foregone conclusion. Jason stepped up looking to add to his account for the season but a dodgy penalty spot, a scuffed kick and the keeper guessing correctly was enough for the ball to stay out. (Coupled with trying to take the sacred #10 shirt of Tim Gates, this was an instant WIG).
As the second half ramped up a lapse in concentration at the back led to a ball bobbling around in the Meads box and it was stabbed home by the home side. 2-1 Tiffs.
The game continued to ebb and flow and both teams had chances to score, a late sin bin for Meads put paid to any chances of an equaliser but a spirited performance left plenty of positives. Everyone battled but a particular shout out to Will Youle who showed some real class in midfield and ‘The Tugboat’ who was solid as a rock at the back.
Onwards and upwards for the 5’s, WE GO AGAIN.
MOM – Will Youle
WIG – Jason Reid
Squad: Evans, Wallace, Tugman, Tanner, Klajnscek, Ring, Jackson, Youle, Gates, Bridle, Reid, Stichbury, Sowerby, Purcell.
Old Meadonians 6s 1 – 0 Glyn Old Boys 3s
All the lads were down nice and early on Saturday with the terrible start to the season clearly not affecting team spirit. Cigarettes were being smoked, balls were being kicked into the allotment, everyone was burying penalties (Remember this bit) and Gribbler’s dress sense was worse than ever, you love to see it. On top of all this, confidence was high despite 3 league losses on the bounce in the league and we believed today was the day we would finally get some points on the board.
After a long team talk from Smithy, who took over just as Alfie was about to start talking, an overall decent performance from Meads ensued where we dominated for most of the game, some notable parts were:
- Alfie receiving an awful and unwanted pass at the back from Jacob, with Alfie then trying to clear the ball out with his right, which cannoned off his left and into the path of the striker. He recovered well though and the striker put his shot into the path of a British Airways flight.
- Smithy screaming at Guivin after a shocking pass ‘down the line’ which actually ended up ‘straight through the middle’. Guivin was very confused as to why he got the blame.
- TK missing a first half sitter. Unheard of from a striker who has scored 4,757,560 goals down at Rocks Lane on a Thursday night. He then had a shot cleared off the line near the end!
- An impressive debut for Stretch in CM who had come down for a few minutes and ended up starting the game. More on this below. Also a big mention to Samie who came down to play for us from the 4s. Very good debut.
- We learnt that, as long as the ball isn’t stationery, Gribbler can actually smack them, which made us feel comfortable passing the ball back to him. Well, he had nothing else to do all game.
- Dom missing a penalty which was caught on camera. It’s now in the hands of You’ve Been Framed. Pogba run up went very wrong. Remember the penalties before the game??
- Being denied a second penalty for an obvious handball. Something the legendary LeBron James would have been proud of.
- A special mention to Alfie making a last ditch challenge late on and injuring himself in the process to save the team a win and a clean sheet
With all of this, the score remained 0-0 with 10 to go and we thought, despite our total control of the game that we where going to end up with 1 point when…..
Young Kortney, who has been banging on Alfie’s door for a start in the last few weeks, scored with 2 minutes to go heading home and lovely cross. 1-0 Meads. Alfie might have to open that door!!
A great win for meads who controlled the game from start to finish. Gribbler had nothing to do all game, except maybe think about his dress sense, the back line were never really in threat, midfield battled superbly well and the forwards caused continuous issues for their defenders.
Man of the Match: Dave Ryan
Only played the second half this week, because he was too lazy to walk over Barnes Bridge at 1.10pm, instead ordering an Uber which got him to game seconds before kick off. On pitch, faultless!
Moose of the Match: Dom Cooke.
The penalty miss is available on video for anyone wanting to see it.
Report by Jacob Cubitt.
Sinjuns Grammarians IV vs Old Meadonians VII
Final Score 8-0
Humble pie was there for all to eat, whilst we stood on Trinity playing fields staring at our feet. Some gazed at the heavens, others were left dejected, in a heap on the floor, this sorry felt weekend, OM7s were very poor.
Omens were good, for once the gaffer was on time, but Jerome Adams crying off was surely a sign…Quickly 1 became 4 before the first half was finished, the look on our players faces was desolated, moral was diminished.
Not even an ear-bashing from the midwife could help us raise our game, no change of tactic, formation or substitution, it was all the same. When the goings good and everything you touch turns to gold, your opponent no doubt is bound to fold.
Wave upon wave of attacks, unable to stem the flow, OM7s had succumbed to a new low.
We go again….
Old Meadonians VIII 5 – 1 Old Tiffinians IV
Team sheet: Adam Joe Ben L Ben W Stan Ant Mo Elliot Nick Raj Max Jean Charlie Jim
Perfect weather predictions for our first cup game at home from our weatherman “little breeze but warm the rest of the day and cloudy”. This week the team saw the welcomed return of a GK with Joe back after unconfirmed suspicions of a national team call up last week for Macedonia. As far as we know, GK Tom is still on his way to last weeks game in Woking, god speed. Our boys Max, Raj, Adam, Weatherman Nick and Jean back in the squad this week with new signing of the week – Jim, who’s come back out of retirement for some Meads football and victory beers, top man.
Keen for a win, Meads warmed up well before the game to hit the ground running in the first half. An early goal from Weekes with a ‘Thierry Henry’ style finish, dribbling around defenders from the edge of the byline and curling it around the keeper with precision shot into the bottom right hand corner, Meads go 1-0 in front. Minutes later Meads were hit with an injury after Adam fell over his favourite patch of grass on the pitch, resulting in a player down with a sprained ankle, substitution.
Mo (the Meads Salah) turned up the heat again for Meads getting control of the ball in the box, powering one home from close range, making it 2-0. Old Tiffinians IV’s back line then started to crumble and submit with Weekes using his pace to make it a 3rd, 3-0.
The game was in our favour, the teams fitness was shining through and Meads had majority of possession playing out nicely from the back. 30 mins in, a ball hoofed over the top by Tiffinians, immediately chased down by GK Joe heroically coming off his line faster than a hornet on roids, resulting in a collision with their striker and the ball out for a throw. It didn’t look good with Joe’s previously cracked ribs taking the hit, but it wasn’t going to keep the Macedonian international (still unconfirmed) down and sheer determination and desire to play on for Meads took over and Joe carried on. Just before half time a Meads corner was whipped in nicely with Weatherman Nick jumping up majestically like a salmon upstream with a crisp header to make it 4-0. Half time.
The 2nd half carried on much the same, however Old Tiffinians tried to fight back, Joe noticeably making some good saves but couldn’t keep them out and later on, a consolation goal for Tiffinians to rob Joe of a clean sheet.
Meads kept possession and attacked in the oppositions half until the 90th minute, everyone believing the game was all but over…A late corner, leading to some desperate defending and a touch off Weekes foot spun the ball up into the air, Lane positioned himself well jumping up 35ft for a power header inside the box, the keeper getting just a glove to it as it went under the crossbar and in. Was it game over? It was now! A cracking win for the boys, COYM!
MoM – Weekes
WIG – Stan